Don’t assume that anyone in your office or workplace thinks about you, or your professional future, as much as you do. They don’t.

For example, several years ago I knew a young 20-something who was passed over for a promotion. He got all bent out of shape because the person who got the position wasn’t as qualified as he was. He assumed everyone in the company would jump to the conclusion that he was passed over for the promotion because his boss didn’t like him or because his boss had no confidence in his abilities. Basically, he believed his chance at upward mobility at this particular company was shot.

For weeks he internalized his anguish over the situation until one day, he could hold it in no longer. He walked into the office of a trusted colleague (who had been passed over for the same promotion) and blurted out his bitter frustrations. “What is everyone going to think about you and me when this uneducated, under qualified ninny shows up and we have to report to her? Everyone is going to think we must be even dumber than she is!”

To his surprise, his colleague was quite calm about the whole situation. She said, “no one is going to be worried about us at all. They’ll be too busy gossiping about how incompetent the big boss must be for hiring this disaster.”